Due To Marriage

Several people have asked if I believe in marriage after everything I have been through. And I suppose the answer they are expecting to hear allows them a second to breathe a sigh of relief as they reflect on their own situation. Some people, when hearing of my divorce, will automatically switch gears in their conversations when I walk by just to be sure I hear them trash marriage. I assume this is to make me feel better.

I started watching this TV show a few weeks ago and thought I recognized one of the actresses from something else she had been in. Like a good nerd would do, I immediately looked her up on IMDB and Wikipedia. In one of the notes I read, it mentioned that she had recently been replaced on the show by another actress "due to marriage". I read the description again; "due to marriage". It was written as though she had been struck by some incurable disease and that this terminal illness had come upon her without her consent and was relentlessly choking her career to lifelessness.

Marriage is not a deadly disease or something that the unfortunate come down with against their will. It does not sneak up on the simple minded and squeeze the life out of the afflicted.

It is not something to be looked down on or trashed. Those that are married should not be looked upon with pity but esteem. We should raise them up and celebrate with them because they have accomplished what so few are able to in this time. Being married is not only a choice that both have made to each other but it is a commitment that takes work, daily forgiveness, and the kind of love that many never experience.

I do not feel bad for those who are married, I envy them. They have something I once thought belonged to be. Something I thought I had the strength and maturity for. They are my hope for another chance at not just true love but real love.

Yes, I still believe in marriage.