Three Favorite Things

This, but with more yelling.

Getting to school was always an adventure for our family. And we have tried every way imaginable to make it easier. Sometimes my parents would drop us off. We took the bus for a while there, which for a shy kid like me was tough to do every day dealing with the scramble for a seat, kids yelling over each other all while the driver was desperately trying to maintain their own sanity. We moved to a neighborhood close to the school when I was in 4th grade and we walked to school most of the time. Then again, it was the midwest, so if it was raining, snowing, too hot or too cold, we would convince Mom or Dad to drop us off. When you have four elementary kids and an infant to tow around it gets complicated. Later when you have one kid going to private school, one in public high school, two in Jr. High, and one in elementary school, it gets a bit crazy.

If you come from a family of several kids like mine or even if your family only had one or two kids, you know there are some days when you have plenty of time and other days when you barely stop before everyone jumps out of the car to make it on time. No matter how late we were running my parents had a rule that was strictly enforced before we exited the vehicle. We had to kiss them goodbye. It did not matter if we were late, we had to kiss them. it didn't matter if other kids were watching, we had to kiss them. it didn't matter if we screamed at each other the whole way there because of some wardrobe choice that wasn't agreed upon, we had to kiss them.

Some days it only fueled the fire of whatever argument was taking place especially if it was something surrounding the ongoing debate on how grown up we were and how we should be allowed to make our own decisions. But on most occasions, it wasn't a big deal. it was something we did because it was expected or because they wanted it. Looking back though it was really so much more than that. It gave us a few seconds to reset before we walked in the doors of our school. It gave us something to hang onto on the days when we didn't feel confident in ourselves among the clicks at school. If we had a bad day or were just feeling down, we could remember that we were loved and that we had a home to go to where that love was unconditional.

More than that, it was a way for us to honor our father and mother. By placing that relationship higher than the possible reactions from friends that might see us or the personal embarrassment one might feel as a seventeen-year-old smooching his dad, we showed with an outward sign of affection, that reaffirmed our parents as primary players in our lives. Every day we would kiss them and they would holler after us as we jumped out of the van, "Remember who you belong to". This was to encourage us to stand out from the crowd and remind us that we represent our parents, our family and that we ultimately belonged to God.

I have recently begun playing a game with my son to encourage him to let me kiss him. He is three and does not have the time or patience any longer to be held or cuddled. So I make him give me my three favorite things; hugs, kisses, and tickles. I get to squeeze him and kiss him quick and get a quick giggle and he knows that he gets to keep playing after he lets me. This has been going on for the last several months and we have both enjoyed the quick reconnect time once or twice a day performing this ritual. A few mornings ago, it really paid off.

It has been snowing record amounts here in Boise so I have been driving him to and from daycare to relieve my wife's stress level a bit. We went through our normal morning routine and when we arrived at his "school", because of the bad weather there were only a handful of other kids. It was eerily quiet when we walked in and the mood was definitely different than the busy chaos that normally dominates the room. We took off his coat and shoes, as is the custom but when I went to leave and say goodbye he stopped me and pulled me aside. "Can I have your three favorite things?" My heart melted. "Of course kiddo!" We hugged and I kissed him on the cheek. I went to tickle him and he smiled but didn't laugh. He was still nervous for the day. I reminded him he needed to be good and that when I was done with work I would pick him up and we can have more time later to play and get tickles. He laughed out loud and marched into class.

Not actually us, but I would be happy to pose if asked.

I almost lost it leaving that day but I knew he was good. We had reset for the day and at the end of everything we would be at home again enjoying each other's company. Probably playing cars or trains. More than likely watching another repeat episode of Paw Patrol. But no matter what we will be doing, he will be doing it knowing he is loved and that he can always come to me for my three favorite things.